Coyote Yellowstone                            click to enlarge

If you were a mouse, or a vole, or even a ground squirrel, and I am in no way suggesting you are, you would have a vastly different life. You’d be a lot smaller and quite a bit hairier and you would be constantly preoccupied with eating. Now even if that description fits some of you and of course I am in no way suggesting it does, you’d have one more concern to keep in mind.

And that would be The Lurker. The Lurker is that ominous presence that is always just out of sight, but you know it’s there, waiting, waiting, and well, lurking, back there in the shadows ready to get you. And the getting of you is the deal. If you get got it is game over. No more rustling in the grass, no more squeaking with pleasure when you find those new green grass shoots, that’s it. Conclude-o.

Now if you are that small little rodent busily eating your way to oblivion and you are not paying attention to the first rule of rodent survival which is “Never get far from your den” and the second rule, which is “Don’t chew with your mouth open” and the third rule which is “Remember the Lurker” then you are in for what is known in the rodent world as a really ugly day. There are no “Hey wait” or “Listen I just stepped out here for a smoke and some fresh green grass shoots” or “Who’s going to feed my cat” it is simply Bite, snap, gulp, and Next ! and the lurker is on his way.

So this is a reminder to all the little hairy, grass munching, squeaky little rodents out there, keep your blue cross up to date, sometimes the Lurker misses, and when you get to that comfortable just full feeling, stop eating, and finally, send your Mother-in-law out there first, the mean one, to see if the lurker is nearby. You just might get lucky.