Tag Archives: Tsunami

Christmas Top Ten Gift Selection # 9 The Wave Generator

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WaveGeneratorOahu7685

Note: This is a repost of one of our Top Ten Gifts for the discerning buyer originally published in December of 2013, a year that will live in infamy. In what has become a half-assed tradition here at The Institute we have been irregularly reposting these now famous gift selections when we remember to do so in a lame attempt to create a Holiday Tradition and mostly because we suddenly realize it’s Christmas time and we don’t have squat done. It’s fun and we don’t have to spend the time making new stuff up. Enjoy.

Your Very Own “Wave” Generator

Our next Christmas gift selection is for the water lover on your list. Does your gift-ee love the water? Does he keep a surfboard on the top of his Hyundai year round? If he has shown up at your last get together wearing surfing shorts, his speech peppered with phrases like “hang 5” and “Gnarly, Dude” then this is the perfect gift for him and or her.

That’s right, it’s a Wave Generator! Another *The Institute Exclusive, this compact little one size fits all unit, is perfect for the backyard pool. It will turn the tamest backyard swimming hole into a raging category 5 tempest with the click of a button on the handy remote (batteries sold separately). Waves up to 70′ are easily produced by the powerful ½ h.p. Briggs and Stratton tri-fuel motor. Swim in the gentlest of currents or crank it up to the Tsunami setting and watch your neighbors scurry for cover. (Surfer, Boogie board and rope Not Included)

Whether they have a salt-water in ground pool complete with imitation lava flows or the Heritage Oval 33′ x 18′ x 52″ deep Platinum Above ground Pool available from your local Big Box store, they can enjoy the realistic pounding surf of a Hawaii vacation produced by this delightful add-on to their pool environment. For those unlucky souls who may live in a colder clime we offer the optional inline heater to bring the water temperature up to a tropical 104° the maximum allowed, so they can enjoy their pools year round. This is the gift that keeps on giving year after year.

Wave Generator Kit includes handy 4 color rigid cardboard storage box, a powerful ½ h.p Briggs and Stratton, UL approved, tri-fuel motor, runs on kerosene, whale oil, or handy natural gas. (On/Off LED indicator, ‘bright red means it’s wave ready’, powered by separate 220v line, check local codes before installing) one 3/4in. to 4ft. diameter chrome-plated heavy-duty plastic composite adaptor allows the motor and built-in pump to be connected directly from your garden hose to the 4′ diameter concrete pipe needed to connect to pool ( concrete pipe not included, purchase separately from your local plumbing outlet or hardware store ), the clever use of o-rings means no messy welding or soldering needed, and a no-rust stainless steel safety screen to go over 4′ diameter return water port located in bottom of pool, keeps those little tykes from being recirculated through the plumbing system. Plus three highly visible light reflecting stickers that can be applied to your pool walls warning of the danger of swimming alone in high surf, Handy translated (Mandarin to English) construction manual included, illustrated tips takes the guess-work out of those tricky plumbing connections.

Wave Generator Kit $28,150.95 cash, certified check or PayPal accepted. We do not accept credit cards for this product.

Other charges which may include heavy equipment rental, 4′ diameter concrete circulating pipe, contractor bribes, inspectors bribes, additional insurance premiums, o-rings, nuisance fence construction, security, and additional water bills are the sole responsibility of the purchaser. All parts except Briggs and Stratton motor made in China. Please allow 3 years for delivery.

Accessories available include: Inline water heater, sp40 sunscreen, Olympic rated inflatable water wings, lava rocks to place in bottom of pool to complete the illusion of being dragged over a reef by the rushing waves, safety rescue ring with attached nylon rope in Baywatch red, and owner’s manual with helpful CPR instructions on handy floppy disk for ease of reading on your computer or Palm Pilot.

Note: this is a ‘purchase and use at your own risk product’, the Institute, Its Director or shareholders, hangers-on, relatives and creditors are not responsible for any acts that may result in the death and or maiming of any individuals using this product. This product is sold as is with no claims made by the Institute as to its warranty, safety, usefulness, compliance with local building code regulations or durability. In fact, if I were you I wouldn’t buy this on a bet, unless there is someone you really, really want to get even with, then its perfect.

* Note: For those of you unfamiliar with The Institute and what it does, please see the page labeled The Institute on the Menu Bar above. That should explain everything. You shouldn’t have one single question remaining regarding The Institute after reading it. None. For those of you favored few who already know about the Institute, Nevermind. Return to your daily activities. Thank you for your support.

Tsunami

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Frozen6873

Many, many moons ago, before people or any living thing was alive, the earth moved. It did not just move it convulsed. It was hot, the very foundation of what would be land was a molten sea of stone and storms of incredible size raged across the surface of the planet creating waves of unbelievable height. Since there was nothing solid to hurl themselves against they crashed into each other, plumes of stone rising into the air as if trying to escape the conflagration of which they were a part.

There was no escape. Everything was held to the planet by an invisible force which gave the illusion of freedom, seeming to allow the waves to rise to nearly unimaginable heights to escape, but actually keeping them bound forever to this new earth. The tempests raged on constantly over time that could not be counted. Eons of thrashing, and compressing, compacting, contracting, tossing spumes of molten rock impossibly high into the air, sending what would someday be mountains racing across the molten seas surface, the storms raged on endlessly.

But as in all things there came a time when even this constant turmoil had to cease. Through mechanisms that we think of as rapid but actually took millennia the seas of stone began to subside. Heat was lost and the stone began its slow process of cooling and congealing until at one point, nearly impossible to believe after the unending struggle, it stopped. It was over.

On the surface of this new landscape other forces were at work, wind, erosion, freezing and thawing, all conspiring to worry the naked rock away and create the terra firma we see today. But underground it was a different matter. Since the surface above protected it from the same forces that were changing the landscape, it stayed much as it had during its birth. Openings were left on the surface that would eventually allow people to enter this subterranean world and get a small glimpse of what it must have looked like when these formations were alive and moving. Not the scale, or the immensity but a snapshot as it were, of the tsunamis and magnificent waves that roared across the openness that was the world then.

Here is a brief glimpse of a Tsunami in stone.

Christmas Gift Selection # 2

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WaveGeneratorOahu7685surf Oahu Hawaii                                                     click to enlarge

Your Very Own “Wave” Generator

Our next Christmas gift selection is for the water lover on your list. Does your giftee love the water? Does he keep a surfboard on the top of his Hyundai year round? If he has shown up at your last get together wearing surfing shorts, his speech peppered with phrases like “hang 5” and “Gnarly, Dude” then this is the perfect gift for him and or her.

That’s right, it’s a Wave Generator! Another Institute Exclusive, this compact little one size fits all unit, is perfect for the backyard pool. It will turn the tamest backyard swimming hole into a raging category 5 tempest with the click of a button on the handy remote (batteries sold separately). Waves up to 70′ are easily produced by the powerful ½ h.p. Briggs and Stratton tri-fuel motor. Swim in the gentlest of currents or crank it up to the Tsunami setting and watch your neighbors scurry for cover. (Surfer, Boogie board and rope Not Included)

Whether they have a salt-water in ground pool complete with imitation lava flows or the Heritage Oval 33′ x 18′ x 52″ deep Platinum Above ground Pool available from your local Big Box store, they can enjoy the realistic pounding surf of a Hawaii vacation produced by this delightful add-on to their pool environment. For those unlucky souls who may live in a colder clime we offer the optional inline heater to bring the water temperature up to a tropical 104° the maximum allowed, so they can enjoy their pools year round. This is the gift that keeps on giving year after year.

How it works: Waves are generated by a patented system where the motor spins slowly at first, then builds up speed until it shoots an enormous amount of water through the 4′ diameter piping giving it the ability to create those huge nearly 70′ tall monster waves. Kind of the same way Old Faithful works. This is wet fun at it’s best. Order now!

Wave Generator Kit includes handy 4 color rigid cardboard storage box, a powerful ½ h.p Briggs and Stratton, UL approved, tri-fuel motor, runs on kerosene, whale oil, or handy natural gas. (On/Off LED indicator, ‘bright red means it’s wave ready’, powered by separate 220v line, check local codes before installing) one 3/4″ to 4′ diameter chrome-plated heavy-duty plastic composite adaptor allows the motor and built-in pump to be connected directly from your garden hose to the 4′ diameter concrete pipe needed to connect to pool ( concrete pipe not included, purchase separately from your local plumbing outlet or hardware store ), the clever use of o rings means no messy welding or soldering needed, and a no-rust stainless steel safety screen to go over 4′ diameter return water port located in bottom of pool, keeps those little tykes from being recirculated through the plumbing system. Plus three highly visible light reflecting stickers that can be applied to your pool walls warning of the danger of swimming alone in high surf, Handy translated construction manual included, illustrated tips takes the guess-work out of those tricky plumbing connections.

Wave Generator Kit $28,150.95 cash, certified check or PayPal accepted. We do not accept credit cards for this product.

other charges which may include heavy equipment rental, 4′ diameter concrete circulating pipe, contractor bribes, inspectors bribes, additional insurance premiums, o rings, nuisance fence construction, security, and additional water bills are the sole responsibility of the purchaser. All parts except Briggs and Stratton motor made in China. Please allow 3 years for delivery.

Accessories available include: Inline water heater, sp40 sunscreen, Olympic rated inflatable water wings, lava rocks to place in bottom of pool to complete the illusion of being dragged over a reef by the rushing waves, safety rescue ring with attached nylon rope in Baywatch red, and owner’s manual with helpful CPR instructions on handy floppy disk for ease of reading on your computer or Palm Pilot.

Note: this is a ‘purchase and use at your own risk product’, the Institute, Its Director or shareholders, hangers-on, relatives and creditors are not responsible for any acts that may result in the death and or maiming of any individuals using this product. This product is sold as is with no claims made by the Institute as to its warranty, safety, usefulness, compliance with local building code regulations or durability. In fact, if I were you I wouldn’t buy this on a bet, unless there is someone you really, really want to get even with, then its perfect.