Mules are different than you and me. I mean they’re different from me. I’ve never seen you so I can’t say for certain, but I suspect given that you’re here reading this that they are.

They are incredibly observant for one thing. They don’t always look like it but they are watching everything around them, cataloging it, storing it in their mule data base at the bottom of their brain pan under the “this’ll get ’em” section for later use when it benefits them the most.

They have incredible memories. They remember everything with an unusual clarity that they trot out every now and then just to amuse themselves or embarrass you.

They laugh with their whole body and since mules are big that’s a lot of laugh. You can always tell when a mule remembers something funny. They’ll plant their feet, lean back a little and let it fly. They’ve got no filter, when they think it, out it comes. You can hear that raucous laughter for miles. Many a mule rider wished for one with no sense of humor while in Indian country.

They love to tell embarrassing stories about their riders. The more embarrassing the better. Here this mule is relating to the rest of the crowd how his rider, well, I’ll let you hear it in the mules own words. “Remember that time when we was down near that Chiricahua camp but we didn’t know it and you was bragging about how you could tell if there was any Indians about and you said “They ain’t no Indians for three miles in any direction and you looked up at the ridge and there was about 40 of ’em. You still can’t sit straight from that arrow that stuck in your backside. If I hadn’t a run like a deer parts of you would still be decorating their lodges.” Like I said mules don’t cut anybody any slack.

Once they like you, if they ever do, they like you forever. They’re your new best friend and they’ll watch out for you, cart you all over hell and back, carry your stuff without complaining, uhmm, I need to rephrase that, They complain all the time, at least some of them do. They can be world class complainers. The other ones, who just complain a little, just look at you with that “You think I’m carrying any more of that? You carry it. See how you like it.” or simply ” I ain’t going in there.” and they mean it. You’ve heard “Stubborn as a Mule.” Well that wasn’t made up because they cheerfully do whatever you tell them to.

By an large though, mules are OK, even if they are different from you and me. I for one like mules. I like their attitude. I like their independence. I like the fact that they use their no holds barred sense of humor to get through life. I just like them. Maybe if you met a couple of them, got to know them, had a chance to talk with them for awhile you’d like them too. Try it, see how it goes.

Oh yeah, one more thing, they’re sensitive about their ears. As they can make your life pretty damn miserable don’t say anything about their ears. I’m serious it can ruin the whole damn trip.