Tag Archives: humans

The Baboon King

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There was a time when the First People came up into the world after living under the ground. They had lived there for a long time and had grown to be many. Soon there were too many people because at that time all of the different beings that we now call animals were people too. Because of the closeness and the crowding the people began to fight amongst themselves, each wanting to be in the best place, living in the largest caverns so their kind could prosper and grow and be superior to all the other people.

As is always the case some of the people were much cleverer than the others and could figure out tricks and plans that would take advantage of the other people. Fooling them until soon the clever ones were very important because their cleverness now allowed them to own the best caverns underground, and because they were powerful they would not let the others come in. The misplaced ones who were not clever were made to find cold, dark places where they soon lost what cleverness they had and began to change from being one of the people into lesser beings. Some falling so far from grace as to become prey for the more clever ones. It was a time of great calamity for all who lived underground.

One of the cleverest of all the people were the baboons. They were nimble and being very glib could talk the others into making choices they never would have made otherwise. They had the First King Under the Ground and he ruled with an evil fist. The baboons being so clever soon ruled many of the best caverns and even had those who were soon to be human beings once they were on the land, tricked into giving up some of their freedoms to the baboons. Some of the humans, but not all.

Cleverness is much like Life itself. It has a way of finding its way to the forefront of those that possess it and it did so with the humans. They also had a King but he was a benevolent King preferring to use his mind to change things instead of using power, and he came up with a plan to free themselves from the Baboon people and make their way to the surface where there was so much room, so much land, they could not ever be forced to serve anyone but themselves ever again.

He carefully gathered all the other people together and told them his plan. The baboons were so vain that they rarely came out of their cavern and ignored anything the lesser people had to say. Because of this they were unaware of the plan the human King set in motion, preferring to eat and drink and laugh at the fact that they were so powerful and smart. The Baboon King laughed the loudest and ridiculed those he thought of as his subjects.

Because all the caverns were set far apart and connected by wide hallways it was easy to get from one to another. The human King thought that if they could narrow the canyons enough they could trap the Baboon King in his fine cavern. He had grown so large and soft because he was served by his followers that he could barely move. They would have to make the hallways very narrow so that not only could they trap the Baboon King but many of his most loyal supporters also. The human King knew that if they didn’t keep most of them caught in the cavern they would soon face the same problem again.

Gathering every single member of all the people underground except the baboons, he spoke to them at great length about what it would be like when they went up into the world above the canyons. How there was light present everyday for as long as they needed to do what they were meant to do, and darkness that came after the day was done to cool them down after their days work was done, and this happened every single day of their lives. And how they would be free to choose what kind of person they would be and no one would ever change them.

He then had them put their hands and paws and hooves and fins and scales against the sides of the hallways, and using every ounce of willpower they had, using their belief that they would have a better life when they left the caverns, they began to pull the edges of the hallways together. As the rock began to move the people felt stronger and stronger and they pulled even harder and soon the hallways were so narrow that the Baboons were trapped in their cavern. Only a few who had not totally fallen under the spell of the evil Baboon king made it out. Which is why we still have baboons today, and although they are still clever they were never able to assume the power they once had.

The Baboon King was so filled with rage after being trapped, that his anger took over and he raged and struggled and cursed everyone else in the world. He was so angry that his blood raced through his body, gradually leaching his anger out of him until all of his anger was gone. It was replaced with the purple sand that surrounded him until he was finally and completely turned to stone. And so he has remained the Baboon King Under the Ground until this day.

On some days, not all days mind you, but some, if you stand in just the right place in the lower parts of the cavern in what is called Antelope canyon, you can see The Baboon King’s profile. It is fleeting because when all the people left, to live above in the world, a fissure opened up over the Baboon Kings chamber so that the people could come back and look down at the Baboon King and remember him so they wouldn’t ever let another evil king treat them as unworthy people again. The light falling into the cavern from the fissure above will let you see the stone kings face. But light being what it is doesn’t stay in one place very long so you have to be there at just the right time. Sometimes if you’re really lucky you can get a picture of him.

The Bighorn Ewe and The Stone of Secrets

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Deep in the heart of Yellowstone National Park there is a place that is holy to the Bighorn sheep that reside there. Every year they make the arduous and dangerous Pilgrimage from Calcite Springs, high up on the cliffs of the Tower falls area, where the Yellowstone river can be seen flowing deeply along the canyon’s floor below. A place where they birth their lambs and find safety on the vertical cliff walls, safe from predators, their only neighbors the Fisher Kings, or as we know them, the Osprey, to this hidden valley near the Gardner river. A place a short distance from the gray stone pathway with its shiny noisy beasts full of screaming beings that pass through here on their way to somewhere, perhaps they’re on their own pilgrimage. Most do not notice the valley and its stone, or the animals who come to pay it homage.

Upstream a short distance the Fawn, Panther, Indian and Obsidian creeks join to form the main body of the Gardner river. The Bighorn sheep don’t care about that, they’re here for a completely different reason. This is after all, a spiritual place. A place where they make a single pilgrimage to each year, to do one thing and one thing only. And that one thing is to visit the Stone of Secrets.

The Stone is a common enough looking boulder shaped by unknown forces millenniums ago and deposited with several others in the bottom of the valley where it has lain unmoving to this day. Unlike its brethren very little lichen has formed on the stone, perhaps due to what it holds inside its rough-hewn exterior.

This is the Stone of Secrets and it contains the countless secrets, dreams and desires, the wants and hopes of the Bighorns who lean up against it and tell it their innermost desires. Some of the younger ewes want to be selected by the most majestic ram, others want the lambs they have been unable to produce and pour forth the most heart-wrenching pleas, hoping that this year their wish will be granted. The young rams secretly and embarrassed by their wants, lean tightly against it, whispering, asking for bigger horns. The older ewes want to lean against it and feel the warmth and contentment that washes over them, some of them ask for just one more year to make the trek back and forth from here to there again.

The stone has been here for as long as it and the untold multitude of Bighorns have been living here, which has been a very long time. Originally the stone did not have the flat spot the ewe is leaning against. The countless animals, and it has been countless animals, for occasionally other creatures came and used the stone too. Rubbed against the stone, feeling its strength and wisdom, letting  their secrets pour out like a  roaring river of emotion, washing and wearing the stone away until it attained the shape it has now. The flat area becoming infinitesimally larger each year.

It is unknown if the stone will work its magic on humans. Occasionally you will see one carefully approach it and lay their hands on it rough surface. Some rest their faces against the stone, or spread their arms against it as if they’re trying to lift the stone from of its resting place. But the stone is unmovable, the only thing you can take from it is the strength of it presence. Some say they have received more, some say it’s just a stone. You will have to go there and see for yourself.

9-11

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I heard some humans talking as they walked along the trail down by the river about something called 9-11. Apparently this was something terrible for them as they seemed upset and were very emotional about it. As near as I can figure out some humans from outside their territory came in and did something that killed a huge number of them at their favorite gathering place. This wasn’t done over collecting females or defending their territory it was for some strange reason called terrorism and religion. This is the hard part to understand. We don’t have anything called terrorism or religion, what is it? Why would those things make them want to kill the entire herd? Humans have always been strange, but to kill a whole herd for something I don’t understand is strange even for humans. I hope we don’t have a 9-11.

The Egg Inspector

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In our long-standing tradition of bringing forth new and unusual information about our animal neighbors the Director and instructors here at The Institute would like to unveil a new program. It is called Our Animal Friends At Work or OAFAW. Periodically we will feature the occupations of our animal neighbors and highlight their activities and responsibilities.

Given the sheer size of our collective national parks, monuments, refuges, natural areas and other places where the public can come and view the scenic wonders and abundant animal life, humans cannot perform all the jobs required to maintain and keep these areas in working order. Consequently some of these operations have to be delegated to our animal partners.

Our first featured guest employee is a hard-working dedicated individual who is in charge of a very important position at Bear River Migratory Bird Refuge in Utah. Meet Chief Inspector Long-tailed Weasel, or simply LT as he is known to his colleagues. He has a very important job here at the refuge in maintaining the integrity and quality of the eggs that are produced by all the different species of migrating birds that stop off here at the refuge on their way to somewhere else.

 Literally thousands and thousands of migrating birds pass through the refuge and many will stop off and lay their eggs in nests, depressions in the ground, nests hanging from the bullrushes ringing the shoreline, or for those who can’t be bothered just laying them anywhere they happen to feel like. Without supervision and guidance there is ample opportunity for mishap or just a general lessening of quality of the eggs produced here. That’s where LT the Egg Inspector comes in.

He works tirelessly but ceaselessly, observing, locating and entering every nest he can to check the egg clusters integrity. When he finds a nest his first job is to check on the eggs within for quantity, color, size, conformation, shell integrity, and the well-being of the contents inside the egg. This he does by performing a procedure called CIOEIU (pronounced SEE-Oh-E-EEW)  or Cracking It Open, Eating It Up. If in his opinion the egg contents bear further investigation he will proceed to perform CIOEIU on each egg in the nest until he is sure the viability of the eggs is correct. This is a thankless task as he gets little or no support from the owners of the nest, in fact he is harassed and discouraged from performing his duties at every nest he checks. But he perseveres because that is his job and he must perform it regardless of public opinion.

There are many selfless dedicated animal volunteers that perform thankless tasks like this every day of the year to keep our natural areas open and operating at peak efficiency. Without them we would be overcome with problems that we would be hard pressed to solve ourselves, so we thank you Chief Inspector Long-tailed Weasel and all others like you for doing what needs to be done. Because of you Nature is a better place.