Help Wanted ! Shark Polisher

Shark Polisher urgently needed at the World Famous Shark Emporium here at The Institute. Experience helpful but not required. Work side by side with Great Whites, Hammerheads and those goofy but loveable Bullsharks. On the job training. Excellent benefits. Swimming experience a plus but not essential. All equipment provided. Employee must supply their own swimwear. If you have ever wanted to experience the excitement of polishing a shark in its own un-natural environment this is the opportunity of a lifetime.Our sharks occasionally become tarnished due to the constant exposure to the public and need to be polished to bring back their full luster. Be able to brag to your friends and loved ones that you not only work at the prestigious Institute but you are a shark polisher! We have immediate openings on all shifts. Daycare, 401k’s, insurance referrals, parking validated, remodeled break room, tattoo removal, especially those prominently displayed on appendages, discounts at the main Institutes cafeteria, free subscription to The Institutes blog, BigShotsNow.com, T-shirt with I am a shark polisher emblazoned on both front and back provided after one full month of shark polishing, automatic notification of next of kin if for some reason you do not complete your shift, maternity and/or fathernity leave available no questions asked, are all provided. We are an equal opportunity employer. We cheerfully meet the new government minimum wage requirements. Se habla espanol. Send resume or your name and a working phone number to The Director at The Institute. Immediate response guaranteed.